It makes children detonate explosives

I've been meaning to write about my new computer, but to be honest there's not much to say. I have a new computer and it seems to work, which is all you can ask really. Perhaps the greatest technological advance of the new computer is the camera, which allows me to take pictures of what's rapidly becoming my bald patch.


The problem is that this entails me roughly lining myself up with the camera, turning around and tilting my head back, then fumbling around for the button to take the picture. It's not an easy process.


My mum bought me those curtains for Christmas one year, you know.

The annoying thing about the balding patch is that nobody mentioned it to me. About a year or so ago my mum mentioned that I was thinning out a bit up there, which I was well aware of, but I hadn't realised that it had got to the stage where it looks like that. It doesn't feel like it should look like that when I run my fingers over it. I'd have thought that at some point over the last year someone would have remarked upon how thin it was getting, some ribaldry about noticing that it was raining much sooner than previously or something, but no; everyone is either too polite or convinced that I'm so flakey that even mentioning it would lead to some sort of public breakdown.

The problem now is how to go about managing it. Keeping my hair shorter would seem sensible, but I am on the tubby side and extremes of hair on tubby men never look dignified.